My Marijuana

its a poison, its a drug.
something that always returns.
regardless of how you dispose it.
moaning as i chuck it behind again...

it bites, it rips, it tears apart.
bit by bit...it snaps at your soul.
with every word stinging like acid.
wincing as it takes another chunk off...

resist it, fight back.
oh wait...you can't.
you've got nothing left to fight with.
no target to shoot at...

no guns or roses.
no words or proses.
nothing that would stand a chance.
it just doesn't matter...

like words falling on deaf ears...

twistedshaft
31/07/08
shouting while firing blanks. when will they have their chance?

6 Quotes on Persistance

...stumbled on these on the net.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
- Thomas Alva Edison

Guilty.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
- W.C. Fields

Not applicable. Yet.

The best way out is always through.
- Robert Frost

Very true.

You're not obligated to win. You're obligated to keep trying to do the best you can every day.
- Marian Wright Edelman

I believe that.

The secret of success is constancy to purpose.
- Benjamin Disraeli

I'll live by that.

twistedshaft.
29/07/08
Love is within us. Just waiting to be released.

No Greater Love

The ground taken from underneath my feet
I fell to the floor
Kicked and looted till there was nothing

Trampled into the dirt, left in a heap
A bloodied, bruised and mangled mess
Everything had been taken

But one thing
The only constant
The one thing that no one could take away

I stood up
Trudged on down the path
Putting one feet ahead of the other

Singing a tune
While pulling that treasure closer
Placing it against the drum whose beat gave life

There is no greater love

Than a friend laying down his life for another
Than a stranger taking the blow for someone he never knew
Than a lover giving up his happiness in exchange for the happiness of the one he loves

They say,
Love is patient, kind, does not boast, does not envy. It is not proud, not self seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
- Adapted from 1 Corinthians 13:5

There is no greater love.

twistedshaft.
18/07/08
always trusting, hoping, persevering. till that day.

Just an urge...

Was looking through my schedule and my homework list.

5 days a week with lessons ending at 340, exception of Monday, which ends at 430.
3 consolidation sessions, every week for 7 weeks.
Loads and loads of homework to finish, even though I'm relatively keeping pace with my tutors.
Numerous VA's/projects, to complete with looming deadlines. (Chinese/Literature)
Weekly quizzes and lecture tests.
Reaching home at 8 almost 5 days a week.

These 6 lines,
Even they can't fully express all the stuff I've got lined up for me.
The small but significant tasks/pieces of work here and there are just too many to name.

At that moment,
I felt the sudden urge to fulfill a wild fantasy of mine.
QUIT SCHOOL PLAY GUITAR.
Imagine, the fun, the freedom, the music :)

Oh well,
Crashed back down to Earth moments later.
That's why its called a wild fantasy.
The sheer improbability of it.

It would've been nice though.

twistedshaft.
16/07/08

Inspiration

I find that I'm starting to write better.
Some new inspiration I've found.
The words seem to come to me easier.
May be I'll carve a career out of this. :)

To be released: No Greater Love

A working progress...

twistedshaft.
13/07/08

I'll Keep Singing

We all sing for a reason.
Be it for a small or significant cause.
We all have something we sing for.

We take that reason, that cause.
Hold it tight and let the notes flow out of us.
Allowing these notes to fleet towards their goal.

I take my reason, my cause.
And I keep singing, its all I want to do.
In hope that the notes i sing will become pleasant and welcome.
And that someday someone will hear me and sing back.

Hear me. Whenever you're ready. Cause i'll never stop singing.
twistedshaft.
13/07/08

Smile :)

In three words I can sum up everything that I've learned about life, "It goes on." When the going gets tough, make yourself realize that no matter what your problem is, someone is and always will be fighting a harder battle.

Make the impossible, possible. Never give up! You only fail when you fail to try. Keep an open mind; you never know what you may learn.

Everyday is a gift, even if it sucks. Count your blessings, not your troubles. Smile away your days, and dream away your nights.

Life, what a wonderful thing!

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. "

~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

Sound familiar?

Remember to smile:)

twistedshaft.
11/07/08

Penned down quite a while ago...

Its all so simple
The path so clear
I guess I never wanted to find it
I guess we all have to face reality someday

A sufficient stimulus
A moments folly
A weak heart and frail mind
A hand failing to restrain the beast

Is it too late to apologise?
Too late to plead guilty?
Crimes of passion, foolishness, stepping across lines
Sucker for punishment? I stand.

A friendship greatly desired
A friendship given
A selfish desire for something more
A something more not given

The world is fair
We can't always have everything
We can't always possess whatever we want
We can't always win

Time has proven itself time and time again
The hero and the bane
The double-edged sword
As to what the future holds
Only time will tell

In time, only change is constant
People change, circumstances change
I will change, but a part of me will remain constant
Locked in a safe deep within
It growls and struggles against the suppressing bars
To be released by future itself

twistedshaft.
11/07/08

No one could fathom

No offense.

No one can quantify it, understand it, fathom what detrimental effects it brings.

I want to go. To find out where I'll end up.
I want to ask. To get more time.
I want to throw myself in the fire. To see if I burn.
I want to pitch myself over the cliff. To find out where I'd land.
I want to. So badly.

But I can't and I won't. Cause I know what it'll do. I know of the catastrophic effects it will bring.

I just don't know.

Thinking in the shoes of another always brings such adversely opposite repercussions.
I don't mind taking the silver bullet. Or the happy dagger.
But humans are selfish. We all want something more. Even if its something we can't have.

Feelings never have to be rational I guess.

No one could fathom
The emotional tension that builds as every day passes.
I could say/tell/express it to release some of the pressure.
But the bottom line.
I face the beast alone.

I am strong. I fight/duel/spar with it.
But walls will crumble.
People will tire.

Could I discount it all as bad luck? That fate was against my plight.
Wishful thinking? That perhaps I wasn't good enough.
Something I could erase? That scars could heal.

I have been strong and kept my chin up for someone else.
Could I be the same? For myself instead.

twistedshaft.
6/07/08